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HISTORY OF GOING TO BED A WINNER
REPOST BY Troutnut1 
Stories create ties between generations of quitters and create a sense of culture to places like the Q. This one is about how my friend John J. "Darby Jack" Bowler, and how the phrase "Going to bed a WINNER!" worked its way to the Q.
I was very sick with alcoholism when I reached my first AA meeting in 1998. One of the first people I met there was Jack B. We only used first names in our little Montana AA groups, but even so, we had quite a few Jacks. Since this particular Jack hailed from Darby, Montana, I always called him "Darby" Jack, as opposed to "Hamilton" Jack, or "Missoula" Jack.
He was originally from Arlington, MA and had an accent to match. Lucky for me he decided to retire in Montana.
Darby Jack took a liking to me, or took pity on me, and kind of adopted me as one of what he called "pigeons”. Pigeons to Darby Jack were what Newbies are to us here at the Q. And as we all know, most Newbies, or Pigeons, need someone to take them under their wing. Darby Jack soon became what AA calls a "sponsor" to me. With a sobriety date of 11/11/1960, Darby Jack had 38 years of continuous sobriety when I met him, which made him (in Q lingo) an Elder of almost God-like status, at least to me.
Darby Jack and I were both smokers. We stood for hours each night outside after our regular meetings and smoked like chimneys.
My job as a newbie or pigeon, was to whine, cry, snivel, and worry. Darby Jack's job was to teach me how to give up practically everything I thought I had learned in 45 years, and replace it with strategies that actually worked in the real world.
It was a monumental task.
I won't bore you with all the details. No matter what calamity I described to Darby Jack, the question from him was always the same. "But are ya sobah today?" he would always say in his rich Boston accent! Then he would reassure me, again and again, that no matter what was happening in my world, the only thing that was really of any importance whatsoever, was whether or not I had taken that FIRST drink of alcohol.
And he guaranteed me each night, that if I hadn't taken that FIRST drink of alcohol, just for that day, that I was "absolutely, positively, 100% guaranteed to go to bed a WINNER that night!"
I hadn't been a WINNER at anything for a very long time when I joined AA. So going to bed a WINNER was something I definitely liked. I liked it so much that I did it again, and again, and again! In fact, I have been doing it every night since 11-21-1998 and I have never had to drink again.
We lost my friend Darby Jack on March 23, 2002 to lung cancer. He was 68.
I had used the tools he taught me to quit drinking. Turns out they work on smoking too, and I was successful with my smoking quit on March 1, 2001.
So I brought the "Going to bed a WINNER" tool to Quitnet in memory of my friend Darby Jack after his passing in 2002.
I am happy that being a WINNER or going to bed a WINNER has taken roots here. When we use it, or when you see it, know that it has a history at least 55 years old and maybe longer. It is a powerful tool and I hope that every one of you will enjoy going to bed a WINNER tonight!
I know I do, and I know Darby Jack would be happy at how many people this simple idea has helped…
Your friend in Montana, Troutnut1 - Dennis